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Showing posts from March, 2023

For the days you don't feel like writing

The day when you don't want to write will come. When you're exhausted, you have zero readership and the end point seems so far away. But if you stop right now, think about the one person who's reading this at the moment, looking to you for inspiration.  Looking at you to see what you do whenever you hit a slump.  Do you give up and just let whatever progress you made go to waste? Or do you put in your 110 percent to put your feelings into words to share with others that you too experience bad days, you too experience tiredness and wanting to give up... But you don't. Because people are watching.  People are looking at you to learn what you do. Write. Share your struggles.  Know you're not alone. 

Updates on the 60-day no IG experiment

Did something different and watched a video on @Keltieoconnor trying out @hubermanlab 's routine for a year. Totally inspirational. Ties in perfectly with my 60-day experiment with no Instagram. Then I'm going to try out his routines. One at a time. Who's with me? — Brienne (@rienneb) March 22, 2023 Second time around doing the 60-day experiment and I'd like to provide some updates.  (Click here to read about the first 30-day experiment.)  6 days into the 60-day experiment, I've found that: I'm watching more podcast episodes.  I'm reading more pages of books I've loaned in Libby and I find that I have almost no time to do anything else except writing. So. How. Did. I. Used. To. Spend. So. Much. Time. On. Instagram? I don't know.  I have a theory: Instagram will take how much of your time you give it. Especially if you don't have better alternatives.  When I'm on this side of the world (not using it),  I feel so absolutely freeing with load

Be the movie

How you spend your time is how you live your life. Cliche. I know But how many people you know are constantly on Instagram or Facebook or Netflix,  watching other people's lived lives or watching some fantasy/romance on the screen? When you could create your own adventure. Start by thinking how you want your life to be if it were a movie Who's the hero/ heroine in it? Who's the villain? Is it possible that the villain turns out to actually be the good guy? What did the main character have to go through to make it today? What obstacles did she have to jump over, crawl through or get the help of someone? Who's her mentor? What different endings can you put in the story?  you know the ones in books where you used to flip through as a kid,  "Go to page 14 if you choose to see Anna fight the dragons in the dungeon..." Or "Go to page 58 when you and your friends decide to explore the unlocked door hidden behind the huge painting hanging in the basement..."

How to improve your life right this second?

Am reminded of something I read on twitter. Have nothing to tweet about? Have a life outside of twitter.  Someone asked me before where I get my inspiration for writing.  I get them from podcasts and audiobooks I listen to or ebooks I'm currently reading. I get them from living life.   Life is an adventure.  Stop scrolling and looking at other people's lives on Instagram.  You'll only be filled with envy for not having the life they are living.  Not only that, you forgot that people only post their highlight reels.  I'm back on a 60-day no Instagram experiment after finding myself scrolling whenever I am bored.  So difficult to quit.  So easy to get sucked back into it and continue with bad habits. I'm 4 days into the experiment and I'm finding I have so many things I want to do to bring me closer to my goals. My goals of becoming a writer, working remote and travelling the world at the same time. If you're thinking of making a change to your life, how about

Who's your greatest inspiration?

My father.  He taught me how to solve my own problems.  When I was in primary school, I remember going to him with Math problems I did not know how to solve. What did he do? He took a long look at it and asked me for the textbook. When I brought it to him, he asked me to search for the answers myself.  He said the answer must be in there, somewhere. Growing up, our house was a constant work in progress.  Things needed fixing. Like I believe all houses do. When he fixed a light bulb, he got me to hold the ladder. Trim the wires for a faulty power cord, I was asked to watch. The roof needed fixing, I was his assistant tasked to pass him all the tools he needed.  He once demonstrated how to suck out the gunk from the AC pipe.  Mom stopped him before he could ask if we wanted to try. He let us squat at the back of the lorry while he drove around the neighbourhood. Then, it was just me and my sister.  Mind you, we were still in our diapers. He dabbled into many businesses. Construction. Ski

60-day no Instagram experiment

If you're a big Huberman fan like me, you've probably listened to his podcasts really slowly and have taken so many notes about the science behind getting enough sleep or getting sun from the sunset to offset the negative effects of using your phone before bed. His podcast episodes are long and filled with so much goodness. To be honest, I think I'm only halfway through some. To my delight, this popped up on my Youtube feed today.  Keltie O'Connor have tried many of Huberman's routine for a year and documented what she found in this Youtube video .  Clink here to watch the full video.  I've tried cold exposure, sleeping in a cold room and time blocking.  I didn't try them enough to collect enough data to share how I feel about them. In 2023, I hope to try them again.  But today, I've declared Gonna go on a 60 day no Instagram experiment after realizing I’m spending so much time on it again. Yes, again because I went on a 30-day one, reaped the ben

Saving compliments

Back to reading Matthew Dicks's Someday is Today and he wrote how we often remember the bad stuff but forget the good things that people tell us, save for the ones that are truly memorable. He recommends building a file of compliments to refer to when our days get ridden with bad things happening or on days we need a little sprinkle to push forward. I'm trying to remembering the compliments I've received to start building my treasure trove of compliments.  I can't think of any. I remember one of my exes calling my unreasonable. Another one called me crazy. But I consider this a compliment because I believe all geniuses are blessed with a tinge of craziness in their blood. I remember my boyfriend telling me how he likes my writing and he can never write like me. Those are what I can think of in 3 minutes. Matthew also shared he forwards the compliments to himself in the future to resurface them and it always put a smile on his face when he receive one he has completely

Letter to myself

Live your life as if you're watching yourself in the movie and laugh at it. It changes the experience completely.  ( Laugh at your own Anxiety by Julien Blanc ) If you're like me, the fear of being judged or embarrassed is stopping you from doing what you want. What would my friends think about me writing online? What would people think if I told them I want to be a coach? What would they think of me wanting to start a business? But if you put on a different lens and imagine your best friend telling you they're writing online, they're moving across the country, they're starting a new business,.. Will you judge them? No. You'll be absolutely thrilled with them finding their passions, seeking new adventures or chasing their dreams.  You'll be supportive, encouraging or you may even throw them a party.  When we're nervous or anxious, we get tunnel vision.  Suddenly, we're little mice in a field full of snakes.  We only think of not getting eaten. Every

Failing in public

I failed to write yesterday. I failed my goal of not skipping two days in a row of writing.  17 March saw me spending time with my parents. We had dinner, spent some time at the casino and had a durian feast for supper. By the time it was time for bed, I was exhausted.  Yesterday evening, I was on my way back to the country at my usual writing time. I got home around midnight and the lack of sleep the night made me even more exhausted. You could say both times were excuses but I'd say those were really good reasons for not writing. Looking back, I could've written in the afternoon, I could have written right when I woke up. But I didn't. Mistake made.   The good thing is, I don't have many readers at this moment. Only those coming from Twitter if I do post the link to specific blog posts.  Thankfully. If you came from reading my twitter bio, send me a dm with a 👾. I'll send you coffee. 😉 

You don't only live once

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If you know you'll be dead tomorrow, what will you regret not trying? And if you were born again the next day, what would you want to try in that lifetime? Got a nugget of gold reading Ness Labs' newsletter edition #182. Anne-Laure Le Cunff wrote about optionality and how tinkering and experimenting is a more efficient investment of your time and you can do that by taking a new job in a new, unproven industry; investing in an emerging skill; learning an uncommon language; understanding a lesser-known culture; solving a hard problem few people are looking at .  She shared Zach Weinersmith's comic which showed us  you don't only live once . (totally recommend that you go check that out!) Interesting information that supports the comic below.  ( screen capture from the book Range by David Epstein from @okram_ovic ) 

Questions

I'm sitting in a house painted with blue walls I'm questioning whether I'm doing the right thing with my life.  Should I apply for the same job I got rejected? Or should I find another 9 -5? Or should I find remote work so I can travel the world? Or find remote work so I can spend more time with my parents? How can I make the things that I want work?

Gratitude

We rarely give thanks for the things that we have. Like our health, our ability to walk, jog, run or how our body digests food for us automatically. It's only when we get slammed by an illness or an injury do we stop and wish we have our normal body functioning back.  How about the material possessions?  Do we give thanks for the roof over our heads, the clean water we get to drink, the food on our table and the electronic devices we're using to read this?  Most often, only when black screens invade our devices do we stop and think about the years we spent problem free. If there's one thing you are thankful for today, what is it? For me, it's my breath.  It means I'm alive, everything will be ok, I'm going to have a great day. 

Sleep. It's for your own good.

Doctors who've worked a 30-hour shift and get back in their car, they are 160 percent more likely to get into a car accident because of their lack of sleep and get back up into the emergency room but now as a patient.  Only 1/3 of the population is getting the right amount of sleep.  In United States, the average number of hours that people are getting is 6 hours and 29 minutes.  In the UK, that number is 6 hours and 49 minutes and in Japan it's 6 hours and 22 minutes. What that means is that there's a large proportion of that bell-shaped distribution of people getting less than that amount of sleep.  Over 8 different countries, you look at the medical curriculum and look at how many hours of education do doctors get about sleep, most doctors will only be given an hour to an hour an a half of sleep education during their entire medical school education. No wonder doctors are not treating your sleep problems, thinking about your sleep problems, understanding your sleep probl

Start Writing Today

When the student is ready, the master will appear - source unknown. Was pondering in the shower how we often overlook certain facts and information until we're ready to absorb the lesson we are meant to learn. Like with writing.  I took over 3 years to find a way to write consistently.  At first, it was numbering the posts and forcing an entry everyday. I did that by drafting out an entry and editing the previous day's entry before publishing.  I kept up with it until entry #39 where I just stopped writing altogether.  Thinking I had such a long way to go before #100 was too daunting.  8 months later, I picked up writing again. I went through all 44 posts, including those unpublished to look at pieces of information I've learnt and forgotten. Reading what I wrote was a humbling experience.  If one person read what I wrote and took away something, I've achieved my objective of writing.  In entry #4 , I wrote " The next time someone asks me that question, I hope I

Hard work does pay off

I've been thinking a lot about failure recently.  Today, we returned results scripts to our students. Most of them did fairly poorly.  I was told some of them cried. They are the ones who've put in a lot of effort, paid attention in class, never missed a lesson. It must've been really painful to see their hard work in vain.  I remember when I was in primary school. I cried when I received one of my higher mother tongue exam results. I have gotten a 49/100. I cried because I wish the teacher either found a mark for me to pass or gave me terrible marks so I wasn't even close to passing. Looking back, I think I wished my efforts translated to good grades. Now I know not all our efforts will give us a good outcome. But you'll never regret if you put in your best to strive to achieve better.  I reminded my students today that hard work does pay off. I hope this too will motivate you to keep going.  

Self-belief's role in creating winners

Do you believe that what you want is within reach? Dr Melissa Weinberg said  "Without the talent, resources, and raw ability to perform a task, belief alone  will not  do the job. However, it may just be the thing that motivates you to harness the talent, resources, and ability required to get there." Talent, resources and ability are what tennis players Casper Ruud, Felix Augur-Aliassime and Rafael Nadal have in common.  [SPOILER ALERT: Body contains content from Netflix: Break Point Episode 5]  In the latest episode of Break Point, Felix played against Rafael in the quarterfinals of The French Open.  Felix said, "To win at this level, the biggest challenge is always to try and beat someone like Nadal here. But you must believe in yourself. You must believe you can beat the best."  And then, he lost. But he became one of the three players to push Rafael to a fifth set at the Roland Garros.  After the game, Felix said, "I really believe in life you get what yo

Want to feel calm?

Follow this exercise.  Find a comfortable sitting position keeping a straight lower spine. Bring your right hand up to your face and use your ring finger to close the left nostril and your thumb to close the right nostril. Start by closing the right nostril and inhale through the left side for a count of three.  Then hold your breath for three counts.  Exhale through the right side for a count of six. Now inhale from the right for three counts. Hold your breath your three counts. Then exhale from the left for six counts.  You have completed one full round.  Repeat for 3 to 5 rounds or until you feel calmer.  You can end the practice with a full inhale and an audible relaxed sigh.  --- The Kelly Miller's breath of calm exercise is extracted from Jonny Miller's newsletter. To find out more about how to operate and optimise your nervous system, read The Operating Manual for Your Nervous System . 

How to create a consistent habit with writing?

If you're thinking of writing consistently to hone your writing skills, to be more creative, or to start a career in writing one day, know that you're not alone. Before I wrote my first post, I didn't know what to write about.  Will anybody read what I wrote? Do I sound stupid? Does my writing make sense? were questions I asked myself constantly.  I read many tips on writing.  Find a niche. Write about the latest topic. Write on something that was interesting in your day , like the Homework for Life that was coined by Matthew Dicks .  I tried a couple of things like numbering my posts, writing key takeaways from podcasts and videos or just forcing out a blog post by sitting in front of a black page.  In the end, I found what works for me is writing everyday. No niche, no numbering, no chosen topic. Just sitting down at the same time every evening and writing a blog post. But if you look around my blog, you'll notice that I don't write every single day. I found t

Do the difficult things

It's difficult to do the difficult things. But it's more difficult when you look back a year from now and know that you haven't achieved all that you want to achieve because you chose to do the easy things. - Brienne, 2 March 2023

30-Day Experiment Using Zero Social Media

On 29th February, I mentioned wanting to do a 30-day experiment of not using social media. Here's what went down. 30 Jan, Day 1 - I open the Instagram app by habit about 7 times during the day. I am able to catch myself when I realise I have done that and I immediately log out. I'm logged into my less active account with little 'Following' so that may be what's helping me to not scroll and consume any content. I've replaced social media with reading books or listening to audiobooks on Libby while waiting or during my commute. During my free time, I'm making progress on courses I've signed up for.  1 Feb, Day 3 - By habit, my fingers scroll to the Instagram app on my phone screen but I stop before opening it. It is tough as I'm lacking sleep and have little willpower left nearing the end of the day. Before the experiment, I'd have allowed myself to scroll social media mindlessly. I have to remind myself I'm doing the experiment. Also, I'm